Your website is a bumpy slide

A short(ish) manifesto on online copywriting

I am on a quest. Always will be. Always have been. It is my conviction that I have been put on this earth to ensure that every online experience is an effortless experience.
At least for my small part… online copywriting.
Allow me to take you into my world.
Where my sole obsession is simple:
How can I personally help you get through one task with as little frustration as possible?

User experience (UX) refers to a person’s emotions and attitudes about using a particular product, system or service.
A person’s emotions. A person’s attitudes. When they use your product. Your system. Your service.
Or in my world. Your website. Your content.
What do you have to offer? What kind of emotions is your website stirring up? What is the general attitude when your user gives you personal feedback?
Frustration?
Anger?
Disappointment?
Rage?
This. Is. 2016! This will not do!

Every, single pixel on your website is there for one reason and one reason only: to help one human using one screen get through one task…
Effortlessly. Without frustration.
Every word on your website should be written with only one purpose: to help one human using one screen get through one task….
Effortlessly. Without frustration.
There is no escape. The whole experience of trying to complete a task on your website should be aimed at offering relief. At removing friction. At removing effort.
We are striving for only one reaction. One.
Wow! I can’t believe how easy that was!

Let’s dig a little deeper…
Effortlessly: requiring or involving no effort; displaying no signs of effort; easy.
The online experience should be easy. Always.
Spare me your excuses. Spare me your corporate bullshit. Spare me your Ego. I am not here to make you happy. I am here to defend the one human using one screen.
The one human using one screen to complete one task should display no signs of effort. The use of your website should not involve any effort. Ever.
It is our task to make the experience easy.
To make the experience effortless. To remove all friction.

[bctt tweet=”The online experience should be easy. Always.” username=”CopyDimitri”]

The opposite — naturally — is effort.
Effort: noun
1. exertion of physical or mental power:
2. an earnest or strenuous attempt:
3. something done by exertion or hard work:
Makes you tired just looking at it, doesn’t it?
Here is the news. Effort = probably describing your website.
Your website is strenuous.
Getting through one task is fucking hard work.
It requires our one human using one screen to use up a lot of their mental power.
It probably requires our one human calling your office and screaming at the top of his or her lungs threatening horrible physical damage…

[bctt tweet=”Effort = probably describing your website.” username=”CopyDimitri”]

A person’s emotions. A person’s attitudes. Should be one of frictionless relief.
How do you make your user feel?
Frustrated? Or relieved?
There really are no other options. Your user will come out on the other side feeling frustrated. Or feeling relieved.
At least one task on their to-do-list was effortless.
One task. No effort. Your one and only guiding line.

Allow me to conjure up your childhood memories for a second…
Do you remember the thrill of going down a slide?
Climbing up the stairs. Sitting down at the top of the slide. Looking down. In apprehension. Gathering up all your courage… and pushing off. Maybe you braked a bit the first couple of times. But eventually you were sliding down as fast as you could. Smooth. Fast. Wind in your hair. Smile on your face. Effortless.
Now imagine this…
Childhood You is walking around a bad neighbourhood. You come across a playground. There is a slide. It has seen no maintenance for many years. The paint is peeling. It is covered in graffiti.
You look around… Nobody there. You run up the stairs. Sit down at the top of the slide. You push off. There are many bumps in your slide. Your pants get caught on a rusty old nail. You end up with torn pants. Splinters in your flesh. And bruises on your back.
What is a slide? A smooth, sloped surface.
What is a website? What is content? A smooth, sloped surface.
What is YOUR website? A fucking bumpy ride.